Hey, I miss you! Sorry I’ve been neglecting you. So many things have happened. Good and bad things. Made me happy, sad, strong, depressed, rebellious,,, iba iba, sometimes I can feel them all at the same time, it’s crazy
Where will I start? I think with the one that really occupied my thoughts the most these past few weeks. My work life. I know, just by mentioning that word, I know you’ve already lost interest! It’s okay, it doesn’t matter anyway. I’m writing this down now, so when the time comes that I’ve forgotten the things that happened, I can go back to this and read and understand why.
The past few days have led me to this learning. In reality, it’s not enough that you are fucking good, you also need some luck and a little pull from ‘above’. When I was in college, my goal was just basic, to graduate and find a decent job. Once I have it, I will show them how good I can be. I’ve always believed that everything can be learned, as long as you have the drive. Once you’ve learned the process, you can then focus in polishing it and be the best that you can be. And was I surprised that it was not like that. You can disagree with me, but surely, more people will agree.
What’s more painful than being rejected? It’s by being played for a fool first then rejected. I think being played for a fool stings the most. It was the way things were handled. I can surely understand why something wasn’t given to me, tell me honestly what’s the matter. The moment you’ve put your trust on someone or depended on their approval, then you are doomed. It’s hard to pretend that it didn’t sting. But in corporate world, you have to play your cards well. Like what they’ve said, you have to choose your battles, choose your enemies as well as your allies. Because in the end, they can be the key players on how you ascend in this so called corporate ladder. How ironic, because I really do think that the higher a person gets up this stupid ladder, the more they get insensitive and power thirsty. I’ve got a bruised ego, so bear with me. Haha. If what I’m saying stings, sorry, you must be affected then. Up until now, I’m still not sure what really happened, what’s the reason, so somehow you’ve got an idea why I’m disappointed. Transparency is a very big word and even if the management strives so hard to achieve it, it will be futile while there are people working with their own personal motives.
It is a crazy world, if you go against them, then you are a fool. You have to be mindful that at the end of the day, they still have the power to make you or break you. Like what I’ve told you, being fucking good isn’t enough. The best thing to you can do for now is to pretend. Go on like nothing happened, but still be fucking good, hehe, it does still come in handy.
Like the cliché, this too shall pass. I will find again my passion and drive to work. For the sake of the company that’s been sooo good to me. For now, just ignore as much as possible the shitty decisions and shitty people around me.
P.S. How ironic it is that the last post I had was about how happy I am with all the commendations I’ve been receiving. And btw, I just won 2nd place in our credit competition. Told you fucking good isn’t enough. Just bear with me. Chow!
slimtrain 
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